What Is The Six Week Body Makeover?

At the beginning of the year, The Best Husband In The World (TBHITW) set  a weight goal that he wanted to reach by 10/10/10.  I don’t think he would mind me sharing that with you.  (Guess we’ll find out about that, heh heh.)

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that it might be time to kick start the diet into high gear so the goal could be met.  He said he would do whatever I told him to do, but he wanted to see some big numbers in weight loss so that he would stay motivated.

Now, you know my theory on weight loss, but I’m also a realist.  Seeing a big drop in the number on the scale can make you push through some days when it’s hard to stay on track.

I started researching diets that promised a quick loss.  I also looked at whether they were healthy and sustainable.  After examining a lot of programs and even more discussion with TBHITW,  I decided the Six Week Body Makeover was the program to try.

If you haven’t heard of the Six Week Body Makeover Program, then you are one of the lucky people who sleep at night and haven’t seen the hundreds of infomercials telling you why you’re fat and how fast and easy it is to lose weight.  On any given night, you will see this informerical at least once.

In a nutshell, the program is supposed to help you lose over 30 pounds in six weeks. What it basically does is give you an eating and exercise regimen to follow that is customized to your body type. This is supposed to speed up your metabolism so you can naturally burn more calories without having to starve yourself or slave away at the gym.

Sounds great!  But you must be wondering, “What’s the catch?” Well, the catch is if you have enough determination to go through with it.

This program was initially formulated in the early 80s by Michael Thurmond, the fitness guru who is behind the ABC Reality Series ‘Extreme Makeover’. It claims to be based on sound nutritional and scientific principles. The $119.94 Kit includes a Quick Start Program video, Customized Eating Plan, Your Customized Recipes, Personalized 18-minute Body Sculpting Program with supplementary resistance bands, and a maintenance Living Lean Program. The whole program is presented as a Three Step Process:

Step One is to determine your own body type, based on your unique metabolism, by answering a questionnaire which he refers to as the blueprinting system.

Step Two is to create a customized makeover plan for you based on the result of your blueprint and your determined body shape. This part will give you an eating and exercise plan designed to make you lose pounds and inches faster. The program boasts of an 18-minute twice-a-week body sculpting exercise regimen that is supposed to target your problem areas.

Step Three is, logically, to start your makeover.

The program promotes the development of lean muscles which causes your body to burn more calories.  It also claims to get you to lose weight while eating more (5-6 times a day, to be exact) of the right foods for you. It teaches you how your body type reacts to certain foods so you can find the right combination of food groups that will increase your metabolic rate. It is based on the principle that when you eat the right foods regularly, your body speeds up your metabolism and burns food into fuel. In contrast, when you starve your body, it automatically goes into survival mode by slowing down your metabolism and storing your food intake into fat for future emergency use.

What is good about this program is that it is customized for you. It is formulated for your specific metabolism and problem areas and teaches you about the right foods. It also caters to those who have special health concerns, such as hypoglycemia and high and low blood pressures. The exercise program appears to be very doable and undemanding. Plus, it also has a money back guarantee.

There are a lot of positive reviews about the program, particularly from those who had the determination to really follow the customized eating plan. There are a lot of testimonies from people who lost even more than 30 pounds and kept it off.

But there are also a lot of negative reviews. The main complaint is that the detailed meal-by-meal plan is very exacting and hard to follow. You may have to prepare your 5-6 meals-a-day program ahead of time and a lot of people are either too busy or not into cooking to strictly follow it. And the “no sugar, salt and dairy” isn’t so easy to stick to either. The high cost of $119.94 is also a drawback even if it is broken down into six payments of $19.99.

The program is really a lifestyle change, and only those who have the resolve to strictly follow it will succeed. Otherwise, it will just be another costly weight loss program down the drain. (Although you could get your money back, less the $20 shipping.)

How did the Six Week Body Makeover work for TBHITW?   How did the wife who planned and cooked feel about it?  Stay tuned…

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “Before we lived in this trailer, we lived in another one that was a double-wide.  It was just twice the amount of redneck.”

Marriage Is A License To Fart

I know, I know.  You don’t hear from me in forever, and THIS is what I give you?

Yup.

The Best Husband In The World (TBHITW)  told me about a conversation he had with his female co-workers, and, you guessed it.  It was about farting.

It started when one young lady said her fiance told her that he didn’t think women should fart.  He said this because she farted.

I’ll just add here that if you’ve ever had to fart really bad, you know that NOT farting is not exactly an option.

Farting is a bodily function and very necessary.  In fact, I’ll bet farting is God’s way of making sure your eyes don’t explode out of your head from excessive pressure build up.

Beyond that, how many jokes would we really have if farting weren’t around?  Seriously.

In the co-worker conversation, TBHITW said that in the many, many years he and I have been together, he has never heard me fart.  He also said that no such thing could be claimed about him.  In fact, he thought marriage was a license to fart.  They stood amazed at hearing this.

Notice the conversation was about HEARING the farts.

I am eternally grateful in was not about SMELLING them.

The ending to that story might have been a tad bit different.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “I’m gonna snap my $200 fishing rod around his neck!”

Endless Fries

I went to Ruby Tuesday’s the other day, and I ordered the Ruby Mini’s.  Ok, I know there were other things that I should have ordered, but sometimes nothing says “I love me” like a plate of mini-hamburgers and fries.

You can write me mail to make me feel guilty about my food choices later.  Or you can applaud me.  Yes, I believe those will be your only 2 choices.  Guilt or Applause.  But later.

Because my plate of mini’s came with what the menu called “endless fries.”  Now, I’m not quite sure how many that is, but I’m pretty sure it’s more than say, eleventy billion or so.

Imagine my surprise, then, when this is what my plate looked like when it came to the table.

Let’s just say that endless fries is subjective.  The Best Husband In The World and I just laughed and laughed when this came to our table.  This meal was not a case of under-promising and over-delivering.  Kind of the opposite really.

In all fairness, the waitress did come and ask me if I would like more fries.  At the end of our meal.

Yes, I would have liked more fries.  Tragically, there were no more mini-burgers to eat with them at that point, so I didn’t need more fries.  Endless fries, indeed.

So, the next time someone pledges you their “endless love”, you might want to ask them exactly how long endless is.  Or get it in writing.

Because endless at the end of a meal or a relationship, just really doesn’t count, does it?

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “Dad, you know…I’m only four, and I’m already tired of school!”

Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

I know, it’s been very, very quiet here on HealthyWealthyAndWiseWoman.  But that doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about you.  I have!  And I’ve missed you!

It’s just that I’ve been working on some new exciting things!

Like an eBook about nightshades that will be out soon.

And, as you probably already guessed, a new job.  (See how I eventually got to the real reason for my catchy post title?)

You spend a whole lot of time at work.  Sometimes you spend even more than a whole lot of time there…like ridiculous amounts of time, so it’s important that you really enjoy what you’re doing.

To be in the right job, you really have to know why YOU’RE there.  Knowing that that your employer hired you means that they knew what they were looking for.  Unless you know what you’re looking for, you’ll just go from job to job because it never “feels right”.  It’s worth the time to really examine what you want.

I for one, thought I knew what I wanted.  But when I went to put down in words what I wanted and why I wanted it, it was really hard.  Once I went through that process, I felt much more focused about what kind of company I wanted to work for and what type of work was most fulfilling for me.

I want a job where I help people get what they need, feel like I’m a valued member of the team, have a flexible schedule, work with senior citizens (preferably), and can see a future for myself.

Oh, and I have to have fun.  No fun, no job.  (Luckily, I pack a suitcase full o’ fun to carry with me every day.  My fun goes where I go.)

There are a lot of reasons why I’m making a job change.  The main one deals with the “see a future for myself” part of the equation.  If I hadn’t been in the job I’m in now, I never would have been able to know how much I like working with older men and women.  I’ve learned a lot about senior health care, the good, the bad, and the ugly with insurance, and family involvement.

I will miss the people I serve now so much, but to keep improving myself and my ability to help others in the future, it’s time for the next step.

The job market has changed a lot in the last few years.  This week, I’m going to share how I went about figuring out what I wanted, where I searched to find it, and how I got it.  Maybe you’re ready for the next step too.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “I know you’re a big boy and you can stand up to pee, but you still have to sit down to poop!”

Want To See What You’ll Look Like When You Lose Weight?

Sometimes the hardest part of losing weight is the sheer slowness of it.

Physical changes happen gradually when you’re dieting (if you’re doing it the safe and healthy way), and you don’t get that instant gratification we all want.

That’s why I just had to share this site with you. For everyone struggling or hitting a plateau, this is big time motivation.

You just take your picture, upload it, and enter how much weight you’d like to lose.  Then, presto chango!  You see a picture of you with the weight gone.

For example, here is the sample from the web site.  The picture on the left is the model at her present weight.  The picture on the right shows the model with a 15 pound weight loss.

When you choose the amount of weight you want to lose, you can also see if you’re in your normal Body Mass Index (BMI) range.  At this weight, the model still has a normal BMI.  When you move the weight loss total between 28 pounds to 41 pounds she moves into an underweight BMI, and the pictures are startling.

The difference between looking healthy and looking unhealthy is something that we also don’t always recognize when weight loss is gradual.

Come on and try this.  It’s easy, it’s awesome, and it’s free.

(iOh, and did I mention…entertaining?)

TODAY’S EAVESDROP: “Well, you’ve washed one of them, now you’re going to have to wash the other one.”

Stop It!

Two small words.  Too bad we don’t pay attention to them more often.

Overweight and still eating too much?

STOP IT!

Can’t save money because you keep buying things you don’t need and won’t ever use?

STOP IT!

Don’t know how old your kids are anymore because you spend every waking minute on the computer?

STOP IT!

Not to oversimplify things, but really, wouldn’t  “stop it” solve about 90% of the problems we create for ourselves?

Today, I heard someone talking about a family member.  She said that this particular young lady had friends who always “treated her like crap.”  This has been going on with all the friends she’s made since middle school.  She’s now out of college.

I listened to that and thought “What’s really going on here?  Can every friend be awful?  Are they really friends?  Sounds like she’s doing the same thing over and over with every friend, and she’s getting the same result every time.”

Whatever she’s doing with her friends, she should STOP IT.  Unless she likes being treated like crap.  If that’s the case, then carry on.

We all have the power to “stop it”.  We just have to exercise that power.

In the spirit of how ridiculous your life can be if you don’t “stop it”, I’m leaving you with one of my favorite comedy sketches of all time.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP: “No, I am NOT going to punch you in the stomach!“

People Are Hungry All Year Long

That’s what I heard in church one day.  Actually, it was just after the holidays were over, and people were going from winter frenzy mode back to their usual lives that existed pre-parties and pre-gifts.

For the past several years, I have been guilty of “Hungry Holidays” thinking too.  For Thanksgiving and Christmas, I always try to provide a holiday meal for families who could use some extra help.

The “people are hungry all year long” comment made me reexamine my yearly attempt at feeding people.  Wouldn’t it be much better if I forgot those 2 meals each year and donated food to the food pantry every week instead?

And to be honest, I wouldn’t eliminate giving those meals.  It’s just that focusing on feeding people all year rather than just at Thanksgiving and Christmas is the point.

It’s not like it even requires more effort from me to make the change happen.

Exhibit A:  I go to the grocery store once a week at the very least anyway.

Exhibit B:  I always end up with stuff I don’t need in my cart.  Yes, I am an impulse buyer, and those grocery marketing people are the devil.

Exhibit C:  Substituting what I don’t need for what someone does need would not take one bit more effort or planning on my part.

As a side note, I’m going to make an effort to buy things that I think people will really like. Not necessarily bulk food.  For instance, peanut butter.  If I’m going to buy peanut butter for someone, it’s going to be the Jif that I love.  The peanut butter I would feed to my own family.

If we’re all brothers and sisters on this earth, it’s time I started acting like it.

Beginning today, I’ll be buying 10 extra food items each week.  And rather than having them sit on my counter until next Thanksgiving, I’m going to take them to the food pantry so someone else has food too.

I have never had to worry about having something to eat.  And even though my mother and father will tell you we never had much (which I don’t agree with because they are talking about material things that don’t matter) we always had food.  And my mom is an amazing cook, so it was GREAT food.

If you would like to help feed people too, please leave me a comment and let me know.

People are hungry all year long, and I’d like to thank you for helping me feed them.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP: “I love my sisters to death, but they’re real bitches.”

Duck Duck Goose

One of the great things about Spring is what happens on our pond.  First, the ice melts.  That is a big sign that Spring is thinking about coming.  But that’s not the best thing.

The very best thing is what I like to call Duck Duck Goose.  Every year, I hear Spring come before I see it.  And what I hear are geese honking LOUDLY for a good 2 minutes before I see them.  They appear in the sky and glide down to make a long, well thought-out landing in our pond.

For years, the same pair of geese came to visit.  At least I think they were the same pair.  Geese looking kind of the same, after all.  And me not being on a first name basis with them…yet.

Anyway, I like to think of our pond as a sort of Cancun for these birds.  You know, a yearly destination that they look forward to.  Somewhere they can shake their tail feathers, relax, and have fun.  What happens in my pond stays in my pond.

As with all tourist spots, though, they told their friends.  Because this year, we have 3 different sets of geese and ducks floating around the pond at any given time.  And that makes me very, very happy.  I can watch them for hours.

What?  I need to get out more?

Maybe, but if you were here you couldn’t help yourself from doing the same thing too.  They swim, they eat, they lay out on the little island in the middle of the pond, they walk on the bridge, and sometimes they just flop out on the grass and take a nap.  What a nice break after flying all those miles to get back up north.

The thing that really amazes me is watching these two particular geese.

Watching these two is like watching the Olympics of synchronized swimming.  They are incredible.  When one of them decides to turn, the other one instinctively follows suit like it was planned.  They do this every single time one of them changes course.

It’s like watching a couple who have been together for a long time.  Or two friends who have shared a lifetime of ups and downs.  They automatically know what each other need when they need it.  They make adjustments for twists and turns without making a fuss.  They just do what they need to do because it’s instinctive.

It’s what you do when you love someone and want the road to be easy for them.  You pave the way.  You follow quietly.  You make changes.  You do what is needed.   And you do it quietly and quickly.

Without making a ripple in the water.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP: “Now, my mother’s brother—we just don’t talk about him anymore.”

You Say Creepy, I Say Creative

A recent post by my friend Lyndsay of I Used To Be Witty (or, as the rest of the world knows her, Kate’s Mom) reminded me of a recent experience I had at the movies.

First, though, let me say that Lyndsay is absolutely right. (Yes, I said it on the internet, so it must be true!)  For years, The Best Husband In The World (TBHITW) and I have played the “Name That Occupation” game, and the best place to play it is totally in the airport.  Seriously, have you been in the airport lately?  For the sheer number and variety of people, it doesn’t get any better than the airport.  Let the game begin!

For the record, I’ll bet that we give most of you much more exciting, higher paying and more *ahem* “racy” careers than the choices you actually made.

And no, I only use “Accountant” if there’s no other possible option.

Now, about the movie.  TBHITW and I went to see Date Night.  If you haven’t seen it, it is a great movie to see on, you guessed it, a date night.

There is one scene, though, that was a little disturbing.  It was the one where Tina Fey and Steve Carell are sitting at their usual table in their usual restaurant ordering their usual food on their usual date night.  Their big fun for the night is selecting another occupied table and making up the conversation that they think is happening at that table.

Yes, I have done that.  You haven’t?  Oh.  Well, then.  That must be why TBHITW and I were the only two at the movie who looked at each other and slunk down in our seats when that scene happened.

I’m not mean or malicious.  I’m just a little bored sometimes.

Some people who read about my eavesdropping and making up conversations might be all “Get a life!  You are sooooo creepy!”

To that I say, “One person’s creepy is another person’s creative!”

Just so you know, eavesdrops and restaurant conversations are not the most creepy creative things out there.  If you want to see really creative, go to texts from last night or shit my dad says.

Bubba, that there’s Creative with a capital C.

Now, I know Lyndsay loves eavesdrops, and I saved today’s eavesdrop just for her.  I think it just might be my favorite so far.  TBHITW and I were sitting at a very nice restaurant in Chicago next to a table with a couple in their mid-20′s who REALLY LIKED WINE.  As evidenced by the number of bottles they polished off.  Enjoy the parting comment from the young lady at the table…

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “Sure, I can pay.  We can also not go out again.”

Keeping Traditions Traditional

Sometimes I’m too inflexible about the simplest things.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m much better than I used to be.  For a long time, any deviation from how I thought things should be happening was a BIG DEAL.

That’s when I thought I was in charge of everything for some reason.

One Sunday, I heard the priest at church say something that really hit home and has stuck with me for years.  He always liked to start out with a joke.  Sometimes the jokes were great, sometimes not so great, but I always looked forward to what he was going to say regardless.

The joke I liked best was this:

Question:  “How do you make God laugh?”

Answer:  “Tell him your plans.”

I did a lot of thinking about that, and I decided that in heaven I would qualify for the position of Chief Jester.  Not being sure that this is exactly the position I wanted, I decided I might want to change how I looked at things a little bit.

I have tried really hard since then to recognize that I am not in charge, and that I should spend more of my time praying, listening and following.

While I can have an opinion, it does not have to be everyone else’s opinion.

But there are still times that pop up unexpectedly that throw me for a loop.  And, trust me, they’re not big deals.  They’re little deals.  Still, I work up a full head of steam going on about them.

FOR EXAMPLE, we just got through another year of NCAA basketball.  I love watching the Final Four.  I love getting into pools to bet on who will make it to “the dance.”  I love Butler Cinderella stories.

(Because I’m married to The Best Husband In The World, I got to attend the Final Four games in 2009.  It was awesome!  But I digress.)

Most of all, I love the last clip at the end of the last broadcast where Luther “my man” Vandross sings “One Shining Moment.”  It’s one of the first songs I ever downloaded onto my iPod, and it makes me smile every time I hear it.

Until this year.

Why?  Because Luther Vandross didn’t sing it.   Of course he didn’t.  He’s dead.  Should that keep the NCAA from keeping the time honored tradition of having him singing that song?

No.

In all fairness, they did keep the song.  It’s just that Jennifer Hudson sang it.  I like Jennifer Hudson.  She’s got amazing talent with a great career.  She’s overcome terrible tragedy in her life.  She sings the song just fine.

But I want Luther.  I want tradition.

I want tradition in its truest form.  That means no keeping the song but with a different singer.  It means keeping things like they were.  No change.  No variation in song or singer.

Apparently, I’m not the only one who feels this way.

I did a little research, and guess what I found out.

I was wrong.  Tradition in its truest form would mean that I would never have heard the version I love so much.  It would appear from the history of this song, that Luther Vandross singing it was a variation.  It was just the variation I grew up with.

So, yeah.  Maybe our own traditions are just what are part of our personal history, and they adapt for different generations over time?

Maybe I get bent out of shape about nothing?

Maybe God is laughing right now.

TODAY’S EAVESDROP:  “I have an overactive liver.  It processes liquor really well.”